Poverty. My destiny ?

How long more to suffer from the poverty life that im having now?
Can i have an answer for that?
Everyday was like living without any direction.
Every morning when eyes open the first thing in mind is how much i can earn for today?

Where is my olden days? days that have joy.
Life that never have to worried about bills, payment, expenses ect...
Life that i choose is the difficulty way.
Not to say that im not happy with it, just that feeling really tough and tied.

If i have a second choice, i wouldn't pick this way. I missed quite some of very good opportunities.
I felt wasted, but im ok with it. Cos i have a good friend that always standby me.
We chosen the same destiny. But so far we still manage to overcome it. BUT, how long will it last?
We never know.

Everyday for us is another challenge. To fight with poverty.

Fear in me...

Some times I was thinking, what have I done wrong? Why I deserved those faces and attitude?
I may be not the perfect one, but I have done my very best to fulfill whatever it takes.

Things seem to be getting worst. I have no idea how am I gonna react. I’m not that person who chose to escape when facing difficulty, but I’m now feeling like wanna run away from this. Am I depressed? Yes! Am I upset? Yes! Nothing can make it better unless I just turn around and walk away.

I had feelings that I won be long in this universe, my heart is bleeding, my body is swollen, I have no strength to defense no more….

I don’t wanna broke anyone’s heart, I don’t wanna give any difficulty to anyone. That’s why I kept quiet.
I remain silence doesn’t mean I agree, I shut my mouth don’t mean that I know nothing. Is just that I don want to create any conflict between us. It is because I wan a peaceful environment.

I’m terrified! I scared of the darkness fall; I’m scared the thunder of yours. Stop doing that, cos I’m scared. I can’t take those pressure no more….
 

The world~

Been living for so many years on earth, slowly i realize that the world is bored.
no to say that i don like the world that im living now, but the human being are getting very fake nowadays.
sometime i wonder, what made people nowadays so fake. Is it the media? influence by their parents?  influence by their friends or the education method ?